Bellybuttonless

Things I learned today:

• My belly button no longer exists.
• If you drive too far into the garage you will, in fact, cause damage to nearby items.
• Lawyers, like cloth diapers, are expensive.
• Bonefish Grill makes for fabulous take-out.
• Limiting caffeine increases hunger and ragefulness.
• Children you once babysat will indeed grow up and go off to college one day. When that day comes, you will feel old.
• Failing to use a level or laser light will result in crooked wall hangings. It's inevitable.
• Husbands do not appreciate monogrammed onesies and personalized monthiversary outfits to the same degree that wives do. No amount of enthusiasm and shrieking will make up for the bewildered look they give when you confess your purchases of the day.
• Attempting to use your bath robe belt as a rope to lift yourself from the bathtub will not prove successful. Repeated attempts will resemble the first.
• God is capable of more than we can imagine or ask for.

The End.