Sunday, July 15, 2012

Mustard Seeds/Revisited

Remember when I wrote about mustard seeds and faith way back when?
I had almost forgotten. Almost.

I was reminded of them again this morning at church. Those tiny little mustard seeds.
Remember when a mystery friend prayer warrior dropped some off in our mailbox to remind me?

Those mustard seeds. They just keep coming back. And I am so glad they do.
On Friday I tripped over my own feet in the garage on the way in from the grocery store and stomped and shouted obscenities until I was crying so hard I was laughing. It hit me like a pie in the face that I feel ungraceful again.

Tripping over your own feet will do that to you.

But truthfully, it's not just the simple fact that I am clumsy.

It's my soul. I'm trying to be graceful I really am. I find myself drawing closer to Him and farther from my self and I instantly know that His grace is carrying me. But when I tripped, well, I had just realized that it was Friday the 13th and the last Friday the 13th we had, we found ourselves at Northside, losing Ella Grace.


Amazing that 3 months later, He is still teaching me so very very much from a tiny little baby girl who I never even got to meet.

Kevin Queen reminded us to ask ourselves if we are loving our blessings more than we are loving the bless-er.

Pie in the face right there on the church pew.

I have been crying out to Him to please please please heal me. To please please please give us the desires of our hearts. To please please please let us experience the joys of bringing another little one into this world.

I've focused more on praying for the blessing than on drawing nearer to the bless-er.

I had stashed my jar of mustard seeds in the break-up-with-Kudzu-cardboard-box way up high in the tip top of the closet. It's only now that I realize I am right back there again. In need of mustard seed faith.

If you need me, I'll be that girl re-aligning my heart and my priorities, avoiding pie in the face moments, in the name of drawing nearer to my Jesus. The bless-er who has already blessed us beyond measure.


  1. Those pie in the face moments always get me. But thanks for this post, such a good reminder! thanks Ali :).